Kick against the sun.
The great generator,
its spangles and chains.
Belly into dusk
the silence
the still air
the curve of trance.
Let your shadow shimmy
over the floor
of the deep end.
Mysterious.
Cool.
Like Jimi plucking steel strings
with his teeth and spitting out
stones.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Shared on dVerse Poets Pub, an online community where poets share their work and support each other.
Charlotte Hamrick 
Ah, I can really hear the beat in this one!! Nice.
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Powerful and evocative write! Sometimes we need to spit these words out.
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Yes those stones sure hit my eardrums from time to time… Great capture of his music,
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So glad I read your “About” and then read this because I feel the vibe and music of New Orleans and love the imagery you chose to create that mood. Thanks for sharing this, Charlotte.
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Fantastic kick of a poem ~ And that ending line is just superb ~
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I like this quite well. It reminds me Dylan Thomas’ villanelle DO NOT GO GENTLE – it is about kicking back against that which would “get you down” and pulling hard against your inner strings to find the strength to not only go on but prevail.
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The power of poetry like this is that it somehow gathers up a wattage that’s so much more than its few words could have in any other form. Jimi could have played with his eyes open but then he would have missed the great notes suggested here.
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The sun maybe the great generator, but your words here are packin’ a punch here that could power a universe in their own right!
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Very fresh and original work that excites me – like Jimi… I’ll be back for more, for sure… With Best wishes Scott http://www.scotthastie.com
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My favorite part is the curve of the trance..it’s wHere i want to stay always.. is tHere..nowforevermore..in sacred..yes..curved trance!NOW..:)!
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I especially like ‘Belly into dusk…’ and ‘Let your shadow shimmy…’
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I like – Let your shadow shimmy over the floor… and curved trance.. nicely done!
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“Mysterious.
Cool.”
No one quite like Jimi.
Well done!
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This sounds like a concert I would like to go to…
Just missed out on a music festival tonight (rain, exhaustion and general malaise made me decide not to go at last minute), but this makes me feel a little like I’m not missing out completely. Thanks, Charlotte.
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Spitting gems rather ;). Refreshing write.
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Gems indeed, Ash! The “stones” reference is in homage to the songs where he references stones: Stone Free, Stepping Stone, and my fav, Third Stone from the Sun. 🙂
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Thanks for reading and for your great comments, everyone! I’ll be around to visit you all in the next few days. Have a great week!
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Love those closing lines!
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You’ve been experienced. Love this. Any poem that mentions Jimi has my attention.
Loved this passage:
Thanks for spitting out these stones.
-Mike
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Thanks for reading, Mike and Sherry.
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i can feel and hear it all. fantastic!
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I’m so glad you like it, Yelena!
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